One lane out tonight. Again. This is the face of South Florida 😉
Just make it, you potato.
Hopefully you’ll see what I mean.
I thoroughly confused some fans of ShitPostBot 5000 by joining their Patreon with my call sign as a custom title.
Now, a word on ShitPostBot 5000: it’s a bot that automatically generates memes every 30 minutes and posts them to Facebook and Twitter.
It’s gotten kind of frighteningly accurate as of late.
I think it could pass a Turing test:
Give a human instructions to create dank memes, then compare the result to ShitPostBot’s output.
I’m honestly suspecting the Turing Test will pass.
Oh what an amazing world we live in! 😀
ShitPostBot For President!!
Here’s a glorious example of ShitPostBot output from today:
Little do you know, until it’s too late, but many electronic systems feature a sort of latent failure mode that can be triggered by a seemingly asymptomatic event happening seconds, minutes, even days prior.
Meet the Fuck You Cracker.
When the Fuck You Cracker detonates, it goes off taking the software, sometimes hardware, but always at least a bit of your hard work with it.
The event that lights its fuse is often very strange and minor. In the case of Ericsson IRD satellite receivers, one detonator is a loss or glitch in the black burst sync input when the receiver’s internal frame sync is enabled.
In the case of these camera robotics, it’s a slow loss of nitrogen gas pressure in the pedestal which led to loss of even lens zoom/focus control minutes before a live show. Seen here: Deco Drive before the magic is applied.
Other examples I can think of:
Internal software fault on a Mazda 6 ECU causing runaway battery charge to 19VDC
Sony XDCAM deck losing sync and trashing closed caption data on line 9 in a recording quietly– it went from Closed Captioning to Clclososeded Cacaptptioioniningng.
Any number of I/O accesses to an NFS filesystem that’s gone offline
The Monroe Systems DASDEC, where a received EAS alert hangs forever in the machine’s “inbox” if it’s received with an out of range valid time, and there’s no way to delete it or let it expire until the valid window comes up again. This is fine unless you put audio of a national EAS test alert into it, as the infamous Bobby Bones show incident did– the DASDEC will always auto relay this, you cannot override or filter it out, thus not only causing the Fuck You Cracker fuse to burn until it’s valid again but possibly also relighting the fuse on any station that monitors yours………
I’m sure you’ve also run into the Fuck You Cracker. Watch out, it’s a sneaky one.
Last weekend, when I was making the drive to Derp Island, deep in the Florida Keys, it was pretty hot but stormy out and I was driving down there with the A/C on in the car set to use outside air, since the air down there is not 97% diesel spooge like it is up on the mainland. As I was going down the road I noticed the A/C started getting slightly warmer, then the airflow abruptly dropped as if the blower was burning out or the system had sucked in rainwater and soaked the cabin air filter. (I’ve had both happen on that car. We wear out A/C system blowers here in South Florida like mad.)
Then smoke blew out of the vents……!!
I pulled off at a gas station, stopped, and was looking around trying to figure out what Let The Smoke Out, unsuccessfully. Then I started the car again and… maddeningly… everything worked fine, although I had the reduced airflow problem every now and then afterwards.
Last night, I was driving down what I like to call Miami-Dade County’s emergency exit (I’m not telling, otherwise EVERYONE will try taking it!). The road was empty and as it started raining, I hit the vent button again. The airflow faded away again after a burst of fog came out of the vents, then the airflow cut back. I suspected a coil freeze. Sure enough.. I turned off the compressor and cold wet air began to gradually blast out of the vents.
Later, with the A/C back on again, the airflow started to fade away… then the engine misfired(??) and shut down impolitely. I shifted into neutral and coasted into a well lit parking lot to investigate. I found three blown fuses.
Now I was thoroughly baffled, why did things SHORT OUT? I pulled the glove compartment off to look at the area where the cabin air filter is, and found that a wiring harness runs along the plastic air duct. Just almost out of view in the center console area, that ran between the duct and a razor sharp edge on the dash frame.
The plastic duct had swollen up from the ice buildup and pinched the harness, cutting into some wires.
Sorry, no pictures as the clearances were insufficient to get my phone into the space. I was working with a flashlight and a dental mirror!
I fixed the issue for the time being with electrical tape and cable ties to hold the harness out of the area where it’d gotten pinched, and cut up a plastic bottle to serve as a protective sleeve.
Lessons gathered from this:
B. Never trust lazy automotive engineering.
C. Don’t let your A/C refrigerant get low.
* Fnord? What is fnord?
“Hello, Derp Island Broadcasting, may I help you?”
“Hi, I’m with Papa November Network, and I’m interested in an LMA from your site.”
“Okay. We’ll give you 250 watts ERP from our expertly maintained state of the art transmitter site. However, you may not install remote monitoring here, and if you try to visit the site, you will be run off by our management. But rest assured you’re getting your money’s worth.”
“Hey, can you go check on our station on Derp Island?”
I have screamed internally all I can and now I must shitpost
Oh. Look. A cool waterspout.
Somehow I’m just not confident with a toilet that comes framed in “scare quotes”
This is, by definition, a shitpost.