For those of you Miami people at Hamcation:

You lucky jerks

You’re missing out on all the, uh, phun… With the Coconut Grove Arts Festival and the Miami Boat Show going on simultaneously, the greater Miami-Dade area is on rich idiot lockdown.

Nope. It doesn't go back down from here anymore.

Last night I ran afoul of the grubbiest thing I’ve seen out of the Shitty of Miami for years: they had the exits from Watson Island blocked just beyond a city owned plot of land being used for valet parking for the mega yacht portion of the boat show. In preparation for the show, they wrapped the Miami Children’s Museum in ten foot chain link fencing to keep the pesky commoners away from the rich idiots going to see the multi million dollar floating poo barges*. Well… The Shitty of Miami cops erected a road block to ensure that nobody could drive out if they were not coming out of the $50 valet parking….

For several hours… They would let one vehicle out at a time, half an hour or more apart. I was first in line for the exit for 45 minutes. I sat there a very long time watching a quite unskilled valet with bad tattoos try to park a Rolls-Royce.

Screw you, Miami. Screw you and the political favors you rode in on. I’ll be over here avoiding paying more than my daily take home pay in parking.

And looking like some biker dude who suddenly had to ditch the hog for a barely running NABI 40-LFW.

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