Behringer – More like MEEEHHHringer amirite?

Due to the fact that this thing is colossal shit and I feel bad for even recommending its purchase, I am going to classify this as 100% PURE SHITPOST. I feel genuinely bad. The thing does actually work…. SOMEHOW… though the VU meters don’t. Only the first four lights will illuminate. Gee I wonder why? (The fake STMicro chips are the drivers.)

I’d been warned many times that Behringer products are of quite subpar quality, and this had always been my impression as well, but I’d never actually opened one up and seen the horror within. This is FRESH FROM THE FACTORY and it’s got blobs of corroded crap inside. ARGH!! At least… whatever was splodged on the board and initiated said corrosion rinsed away with CRC QD Electronics Cleaner…

Tongue surface piercings, or, “none of this works that way”.

Once again, you’re just gonna have to take the word of this random hacker yelling about the poor choices of others:

Don’t do this. (Identifying details censored using the Glitch app.) It’s not something to be proud of.

What you're looking at here is actually a double ID-10T error

So what’s wrong here? Everything.

The human tongue is a very flexible part, as it needs to be. You can’t just go pinning it in place with a rigid bar.

It flexes in pretty much every possible direction. The only way you’re going to be able to get a piercing to not cause problems in healing and everyday activities is for it to just go through.

This one will probably never heal, and both the person who did it and the customer should know better. Well, even if the customer didn’t know better. Would I willingly wire up someone’s electric kitchen appliances using 16 gauge lamp cord which would get hot faster than their dinner and cause an electrical fire? No. Should a piercer agree to do something this stupid? No.

Just don’t. It does not work this way. None of this works that way. This is bad and you should feel bad for it.

Thanks, Bill.

Now, there are still risks and complications with having it done right, but at least that can heal – mainly I’ve heard of problems with the jewelry wearing into the teeth or gums.

Yeah uh sure, you can trust me saying all this, I’m the guy who had to search for the lost tiny ball whenever a DJ had an accident with a captive bead ring failing to keep its bead captive. The really crappy little 16 gauge ones from Hot Topic launch it at the lightest brush against one’s headphones. The best was when one went right down a headphone jack and lodged there — the DJ’s survival was guaranteed only by the fact she ordered me dinner from the Latin American Cafe while I replaced the jack with an old school indestructible leaf spring Switchcraft from my private stash.

More horrors from a local shop that’s managed to place themselves as the epicenter of all things ratchet:


I do not possess a frame of reference in which to place this level of utter disapproval.

Keep your boards dry!

I mean, it’s obvious, but here’s what happens when the poor things suffer combination of electricity and water…

The smell from this was.... Not unlike that of Subway bread being baked.
That's some mighty fine soldering, Lou.
The bubble under the solder resist fell off when i washed the board, revealing a sticky puddle of degraded resin and smelly corrosion.



Board at left is the radio receiver. Gee I wonder why I was getting a no signal error!

Yackage water.

Yet Another “Comcast Sucks” Post…

Adding another one to the ether of the Internet.

I’m paying over $80 a month for supposedly 25 megabits from Comcast via cable. Price keeps going up, speeds keep going down, as does the connection itself.

The fault appears to NOT be with the last mile – the modem’s SNR and signal levels look quite acceptable. I’m gonna call 36.8dB SNR and -1.9dBmV “Lucky Duck!” levels for QAM256 demodulation… aka “you’re in luck, your DSP can accurately decode this in its sleep”.


Over the past couple of weeks, this is about average:

--- ping statistics ---
2598 packets transmitted, 2428 packets received, 6.5% packet loss
round-trip min/avg/max/stddev = 53.373/535.039/4664.892/482.324 ms

And that’s IF, or WHEN, it works.

Calling Comcast support yields ONLY a “support” script telling me to scan my computers for viruses with their free version of Norton Antivirus. No thanks.

Sadly I live in an area where Comcast has an ABSOLUTE monopoly when it comes to home Internet.

Anyone know of a way to get a real tech on the line at Comcast who is CLUE equipped?

Who needs the American Dream’s indoor ski slope?

We’ve got your crazy thrill ride right here.


It’s become a big game of chance lately as to whether the Metromover will make this ramp and turnout successfully. Failures are spectacular when they happen; the train either shorts out power with a big loud, bright arc, screeches to an abrupt halt, politely comes to a complete stop and sits there in front of the maintenance facility, or goes dark and free falls down the ramp for a few seconds before being slammed to a halt by the spring loaded parking brakes setting.

There is talk about charging passengers a fare to ride Metromover again, but personally I think all they need is this magical phrase heard on many thrill rides everywhere: “Exit through the gift shop“.

Distrust in law enforcement, or the Miami Beach Urban Police State Week

* PICTURE RELATED to my state of mind right now *


I’m a native of South Florida. I was born and raised here for 32 years, for better or for worse. This morning, however, according to a Polk County police officer and the Florida Highway Patrol, I woke up as a fresh off the boat illegal immigrant from Guatemala with a fake ID.


So a little bit of background on this. This is Memorial Day Weekend. There’s an unofficial South Florida tradition that Memorial Day Weekend and the week following are Urban Beach Week on Miami Beach. During this week, there are a lot of events on the week centered around hip hop and rap music. While these aren’t my cup of tea, usually, I totally respect anyone’s ability to enjoy their culture and music as much as anyone else.

Unfortunately, our local officials (which we MIGHT have elected, but who knows anymore) see the crowd Urban Beach Week brings in as an undesirable, criminal force, just a pure stream of thugs driving stolen cars packed to the gills with drugs, leaving just enough space for a few high powered firearms in the glovebox. Plus, *gasp*, they’re not Caucasian. THE HORROR!

The solution? Temporary police state.

So it didn’t entirely surprise me when I was driving down to work this morning and saw a row of traffic cones squeezing all the traffic on I-95 just north of the Macarthur Causeway exit into one lane, then fanning back out into a police checkpoint. Officers were stopping everyone momentarily and letting them go again, I figured they were checking for proper paperwork so I pulled out my license, registration, and insurance card, and plopped them on the dash ready. When it was my turn, the officer, whose badge identified him as being from Polk County, Florida, but had black electrical tape over the name and badge number. This seems, sadly, to be VERY COMMON practice when officers are brought in from out of the area. It originated as a liability limiting and intimidating measure with the Miami Model we’re… uhhh… so proud of. So very proud of. So very proud—

The officer takes one look at my ID and says “Please show me your actual ID, or are you fresh off the boat?”

At this point I was both furious and a bit nervous. I told him to request backup and have it verified, because, well… it’s a real Florida state driver’s license. It may not be REAL ID act compliant but that’s because it predated REAL ID and I haven’t gone through the process of updating it yet. It’s still legally valid in Florida as proof of identity, as a driver’s license, and works for everything except getting past airport security and into certain U.S. government facilities.

The lack of the REAL ID star in the corner wasn’t what bothered him, though, it was that the print is blurry.

Here’s the thing. The Florida Department of Motor Vehicles uses these shitty old Datacard printers to produce our IDs and driver’s licenses. These printers are never cleaned, maintained, or calibrated, and they’re run until they just plain die outright in a cloud of foul smoke (it happened right in front of me when I got my first driver’s license!). On mine, there’s both a C/M/Y/K print registration problem, likely due to worn feed rollers and/or guides, and the print is kind of light and foggy looking due to a temperature calibration problem.

But it’s the real thing. That’s the important part.

This officer, however, refused for almost 15 minutes to actually radio in the info from my ID for verification or do anything useful like calling over another officer as I was repeatedly and politely asking him to do. Instead he kept going on about how much trouble I was in for using a fake ID and asking me how I snuck in from Guatemala and telling me how INS would probably keep me in jail for months before finally sending me back.

FINALLY, another officer came over to see why he was holding up his line so badly, scanned the barcode on my ID with a PDA of some sort, looked at my license plate and VIN number, and told me everything was good. I explained to him what the other officer was doing and… he just laughed it off.

Some laughing matter.

To say this left me shaken is an understatement; now I’m kind of worried I’m going to face this kind of bullshit consistently throughout the week. Thankfully it’s only on weekends that I actually drive all the way in to work… for the week I usually use public transit, and buses don’t get stopped at the checkpoints.

Because, you know, no criminal element ever takes the bus. They all take stolen cars.


There’s a lot being said now about the public’s growing distrust in law enforcement….. here’s another story in the mix. Le sigh….

I kind of wish I’d filmed the whole thing in retrospect, but I’m really nervous that someone who isn’t even willing to stop a moment and verify a perfectly legal Florida ID as proof of valid US citizenship would also treat being recorded as a severe offense.