The best testimonial I’ve ever seen

From a fellow engineer:

Our guys were so impressed with the Selenio at our sister station that as the NetVX aged into backup status, we bought a Harmonic.

selenio shitpost
sorry, I only have M$ Paint on this workstation and it’s fairly useless for proper shitposting

 

For the uninitiated— what this unit does in its most common configuration in a TV station is it takes in one or more audio/video inputs, encodes them to MPEG-2 program streams for digital television, and finally sends the output out as an ASI stream. An ASI stream is a combined feed of all of the subchannels to be sent over the air plus the metadata (PSIP), and is what is actually modulated and sent out by the transmitter. The PSIP is used as an index by your receiver and populates both the channel definitions and the program/station info that gets displayed in the program guide. That being said, it is the house of cards upon which your entire station is delicately balanced. 😉

In all seriousness, this is one of the strangest, most fragile, and most inherently unsupportable pieces of hardware I’ve ever worked with. The UI from which you have to perform most configuration tasks is based on Microsoft Silverlight, which is a dead-ass format M$ came up with to compete with Flash, which is also a dead-ass format. Double-dead-ass? I dunno. It’s pretty awful and soon I predict that’ll require us to keep some old computer around with an EoL version of Windows and Silverlight installed and no auto updates allowed because M$ will just decide to flush Silverlight away entirely.

There’s also a telnet interface into the thing for which there’s little documentation. Certain configuration tasks (which is to say most of them) require a call in to Imagine Communications support because it’s just… well, at least one person who worked on the software knows how it works, right?

The hardware design is kinda questionable and the firmware hocks up hairballs for no good reason. So far across the three of these I’ve worked with, I’ve experienced phantom frame controller failures, A/V desync, audio loss, video loss, video freeze, video macroblocking, unreported loss of ASI output with invalid picture input, reported loss of ASI output with valid inputs, and one that just plain powered off and restarted during the evening news. Oh, and you see that little display on the front? It CAN display useful status information, but…. doesn’t. Also, Imagine Communications’ idea of a “screen saver” for the little OLED screen is to display “Imagine Communications” on the top line, unmoving, forever… so when you try to view any status/fault info, you’re reading it through a permanent shadow of “Imagine Communications” that’s practically CHISELED into the matrix. Ew.

 

The PISS

Note to self:

The PISS is a magical thing I came up with using a bog standard off the shelf outboard mixer along with the telephone hybrid to perform a few different functions including mix-minus, mono feed to the console, and stereo feed for recording (jock on one channel, caller on the other) to a computer for polishing up and re-airing later. I should really make a proper CAD diagram of this, but come on man it’s called the PISS, and it’s going riiiight in the shitpost category on this blog. The REC switch box thing is there because the USB interface in use was in the Arrakis MARC-16 console AND LET US NEVER SPEAK OF THAT SHITTY THING AGAIN

Oh, Elon Musk, you just got serenaded with horns.aiff IN SPACE

So earlier, Elon Musk posted someone else’s art to his Twitter then claimed crediting the artist is “destroying the medium” then he ragequit Twitter after being called out on it, by “deleting” his account, but not actually deleting it.

I feel kinda dirty for once looking up to this turd sandwich. I’m sorry, everyone. Here, enjoy some random derp pictures from my collection:

Aww shim

So that buzzing sound my 2014 Forester’s a/c compressor made since last year? Yeah it wasn’t supposed to do that.

I checked the clutch gap today after suffering mild heat exhaustion in 102 degree weather with the A/C blowing warm… .82 millimeter… Factory specs say 0.1-0.6mm.

Thus it was time to subtract a shim from the shaft.

And then my workday jumped to like 10 hours and crap so what follows:

There’s actually nothing to stop this from turning so I just grabbed it with my hand and used the wrench on the center bolt because I’m some scary beast

The compressor drive plate before cleaning

Pulley side after removing all three shims and before cleaning

I saw it recommended to torque the center to 10 foot pounds which worked fine with my bare hands, once again….

Now it seems I just have cold air constantly and no buzzing noise (was that it slipping??)

Best error message ever

Found on a monitor of unknown function at a Love’s truck stop

OH SNAP THE WORDPRESS MOBILE APP GLITCHED ITSELF TO DEATH WHILE TRYING TO POST AN ERROR MESSAGE ABOUT AN ERROR MESSAGE AND DID IT TWICE 😀

Shitpost Multiball

The Simpsons Pinball Party has not exactly proven itself to be a very reliable game; I’ve never played one where everything is fully functional. Malfunctions sadly seem to crop up with the garage door and mini playfield, and failure of these make most of the game inaccessible! No multiball…. On this one the upper left flipper didn’t work, so there was no way to shoot anything up there.

Just for the record, the way you have to get to multiball is to get the ball up there (open the garage door then shoot the ball in there) and the VUK (vertical up kicker) inside will send the ball to the left flipper on the mini playfield. From there, pass it directly to the right flipper or use the orbit at the back to send it to the right flipper, then shoot the lock ramp which will put it in the couch.

Yes, this is as challenging as it sounds!

So is maintaining an old RVR / Armstrong tube transmitter. Cut to avoid page spam…

Read more “Shitpost Multiball”

Welcome to Derpville Laundromat

Hello! Thanks for using our facilities. Below is a list of guidelines that are not written rules, but everyone seems to follow them, so maybe you should too.

  • ALWAYS block in other customers in the parking lot upon arriving.
  • Please come in with all of your screeching, running, demonic little hell spawn crotch droppings in tow, and leave them unsupervised at all times.
  • Immediately dash towards the largest washing machines we have available with your load of laundry, push any other customers out of your way, toss it in, then stand around blocking the aisle for a few minutes before promptly leaving for half an hour without starting the washer.
  • When you do finally return, hopefully after letting your children pull open dryer doors everywhere to interrupt everyone’s loads drying and jabbing at the temperature buttons on every washer and dryer to cause damage to delicate clothes or leave them uselessly tumbling sopping wet, please place either no detergent at all or half a box worth in the machine.
  • Once your laundry is washed, please leave it sitting in the machine a few hours then come back.
  • Always be sure to leave about a dozen roofing nails in the pockets on your clothes to ensure that they fall out and turn the steel basket on our washers and dryers into a godawful cheese grater from hell.
  • Feel free to wash a blue tarp covered in dried blood of mysterious origin.
  • Always blast terrible SoundCloud rap from your five gallon Bluetooth speaker.
  • Please ensure you allow WordPress to break your so elegantly witty shitpost with the <ul> tag screwing up the editor.

This is based on observations from using laundromats in a few different places, but mostly Hallandale. Good old Hallandale. Wasting away in good old Hallandale….